We gain new perspectives on life matters, new perspectives on ourselves, and develop new goals and ideas. Relationships are mainly hard for this reason.
You’re two different people, both changing and growing at your own rates, living inside different heads.
Prayer is so important in our daily lives, because it keeps us connected to The Head, Christ. And when a couple prays regularly together they can stay in tune with each other through Him.
I have listed a few thought-provoking questions below. These aren’t light survey questions.
These are meant to help start meaningful discussion. And as we go through life, they should be asked over again. Because we are constant works-in-progress, and we’re changing. Your boyfriend’s answer to one of these questions could be vastly different over the course of a year.
Not all of these need to be asked at once, and some don’t need to be brought up as often as others.
Use your discretion, and hopefully you’ll find one or two of these helpful for initiating good, vital conversations.
What do you think I could work on?
This is one you could utilize often. Just check in with him. When you feel like you could improve on something, but you’re not sure what, and could use a point in the right direction. Open your heart and prepare yourself humbly for a truthful, lovingly constructive answer. Remember, you’re in this together. Pray about it.
What is a goal/dream that’s really important to you?
Goals and dreams change. Just as he changes and matures. You want to know his heart, and to stay in tune with him. The things that are important to him should be important to you, because they are a huge portion of who he is. When it comes to goals, meeting them is a big deal. It takes a lot of commitment and energy, and there is nothing more invigorating than sound support and a hand to hold. Strive to understand, to listen, and always remember that without fail, the correct direction to point him in is ever towards Jesus.
What makes you feel loved/appreciated?
Zachary asked one night, while we were watching the blood moon eclipse, “If you could ask me one thing and I had to answer, what would it be?” I don’t think he expected me to ask this! XD But truly, I wanted to know what made him feel loved, and what I could do to let him know I Love him. This struck up a conversation about the Five Love Languages, and was a topic we actually went back and forth on for a couple of days. People are so different! What makes me feel Loved by him is not necessarily the same as what makes him feel Loved by me, and so it is important to strive for understanding of each other. Don’t just assume. This is fun to figure out! ♥